Nose Monkeys

This is going to be an adorable post about my adorable son and his adorableness. If you’re the type of scrooge who hates hearing stories about how other people’s kids are adorable, I mean, I am obviously not about judging people, but seriously you probably shouldn’t have kids. Unless you are a fan of eating crow? Because when you have kids, you will suddenly want to share their adorableness with the world. It just happens, you can’t help it.

The Hubs has been telling The Boy that there are monkeys living in his nose. The Nose Monkeys, we call them. The Boy gets that it’s a joke (I love that he is old enough now to get these kinds of jokes), and he and The Hubs will have long conversations about what the Nose Monkey is up to lately. The following is a typical conversation about the Nose Monkey.

“Hey, how is your Nose Monkey doing?”
“Good, Dad.”
“Have you talked to him lately?”
“We’ll, I did put my finger up there.”
“He didn’t bite it, did he?”
“No, he eats boogers, not fingers.”

I asked The Boy to tell me more about his Nose Monkey. Here’s what The Boy said.

“He’s crazy.”
“He crawls on the booger vines in my nose.”
“I have 100 nose monkeys in there, but MINE is the one who hits me when I stick my finger up there, because he is trying to protect the nose monkey king who is in the back. He has a booger spear that he puts boogers on.”
“I beat up my Nose Monkey a lot. With my nose. Like, I squish my nose and he gets squished. I do it more in the winter because that’s when they’re really active.”
“He tries to get in Lambie’s ear, but he can’t because she’s a stuffed animal.”

Actually, strike that, this is not a post about my son’s adorableness. This is a post about my son’s very bizarre fantasy life. 6 year olds are FASCINATING, don’t you think?

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